Vanessa and Luke met in college. Young and ambitious, they fell in love, married, bought a house in the suburbs, and created a perfect family. He worked tirelessly to advance his career, so she could stay home with the children and manage their busy household. For fifteen years, they built a network of friends, family traditions, and an amazing life together. Everything was going great until it wasn't. Now, they are facing a very painful divorce and a custody battle over two children both parents adore.Family members, friends, and legal professionalseveryone has an opinion about how to come out on top.In You Don't Have to Crush Your Ex, Lori Bonneviera clinical social worker and seasoned child custody evaluatorinvites you to walk beside Vanessa and Luke, as they face challenges similar to yours. You will have the unique opportunity to make choices about divorce, your children, and how to participate in a custody evaluation to achieve the best outcome. Through this insightful and witty choose-your-own-outcome-style story, Lori shares her more than twenty years of trade secrets to help you navigate the complex and often-thorny experience of participating in family law litigation. By the end of the book, you will know how to:Present your best self to a child custody evaluator.Protect your child's emotional health and well-being.Keep your sanity and thrive on the other side.Discern which attorneys will hurt or help your efforts.Acquire resources to manage specific challenges.Save your family time and money.This book is a must-read for parents, grandparents, and interested third parties involved in or headed toward a custody lawsuit over the children they love.The Choices We Make, Make Us.

Court-Appointed Evaluator and Custody Evaluation Coach Lori Bonnevier, MSW, LCSW, is a highly respected mental health expert and author of "You Don't Have to Crush Your Ex: Hacks, Hints, and Hell No's to "Win" Your Child Custody Evaluation."For over twenty years, she has practiced primarily as a child custody evaluator and regularly provides testimony as an expert witness. In these roles, she also serves as a therapist, mediator, parent coordinator, coach, and consultant. As an evaluator, Lori's mission is to provide a competent, thorough, and unbiased assessment of all family members with the goal of developing a comprehensive plan that allows children the opportunity to maintain safe, healthy, and ongoing relationships with both parents and other significant people following a change in the family system.A licensed clinical social worker in the State of Oregon, Lori graduated from Portland State University in 2000 with a master's degree in social work and holds undergraduate degrees in the disciplines of psychology and human services and an associate's degree in child development. She has expanded her practice to include consulting, coaching, and speaking. Lori is now able to share her message of Child-Focused Choices with a larger audience, beyond her home base of Portland, Oregon.